road safety

Today i learned an important lesson while travelling in the bus on my journey from trivandrum to bangalore. The bus had crossed nager coil and i saw the lady sitting right behind me throwing a bag of waste onto the road. This was on the right side of the vehicle right onto oncoming traffic. The bag missed the guy who was coming in a cycle from the opposite direction. There are two things to learn from here. When you are in a moving bus, do not throw articles out of the bus. Two is that when you drive(you could have been the cycle rider) drive defensively so that you are ready to escape even if some blockheaded guy throws out something onto the road.

one day at the training centre

Today was my first day at the training course for getting prepared for marriage. It was with great difficulty that i came for this marriage. I generally hate training classes . But throwing all my expectations to thin air todays classes were very entertaining. Each class just got getting better and better. I was expecting a drab and boring class from a group of boring priest(they generally are a boring lots)

the first class was by rev father nicholas t. His was a high tech presentation using power point from his laptop. He introduced up to the whole course. He explained from points from the bible how to approach marriage. He urged people not to go for marriage and to leave if they cant follow by what he said. His use of the visual media kept the audience attention.

the next person was a father in plain clothes . Fr alex i think. He was explaini for the next hour the meaning of each part of the holy mass. Half of the time he was making some jokes or explaining some unrelated things and at the end of the class he had finished explaining only the first five minutes of the holy mass.

the last person for today gave a lecture so entertaining that for a second i thought it a stand up comedy show. The person was a clinical psychologist. He talked about how peoples tastes are different and how adjusting to others beliefs and habits is very important. His was one of the most entertaining classes i have ever attended.

the only downside is the very strict atmosphere here. If you are a minute late to class after the bell rings your name will be noted down by the good looking nun. And you may have to attend that class the next time to get the certificate.

FW: Stock Market

 

The Stock Market simply illustrated.... is there a lesson here?

Once upon a time in a village, a man appeared and announced to the villagers that he would buy monkeys for Rs10. The villagers seeing that there were many monkeys around, went out to the forest and started catching them. The man bought thousands at Rs10 and as supply started to diminish, the villagers stopped their effort. He further announced that he would now buy at Rs20. This renewed the efforts of the villagers and they started catching monkeys again. Soon the supply diminished even further and people started going back to their farms. The offer rate increased to Rs25 and the supply of monkeys became so little that it was an effort to even see a monkey let alone catch it.

The man now announced that he would buy monkeys at Rs50! However, since he had to go to the city on some business, his assistant would now buy on behalf of him. In the absence of the man, the assistant told the villagers. Look at all these monkeys in the big cage that the man has collected. I will sell them to you at Rs35 and when the man returns from the city, you can sell it to him for Rs50." The villagers squeezed up with all their savings to buy the monkeys. Then they never saw the man nor his assistant, only monkeys everywhere!! !! -




Welcome to the stock Market!!!!!

hi hi

 

Boss: Where were you born?
sardar : Punjab ..
Boss : which part ?
sardar : Kya which part ? Whole body born in punjab.


2 sardar were fixing a bomb in a car.
Sardar 1 : What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.
sardar 2 : Dont worry, I have a one more.


Sardar : What is the name of your car ?
Lady : I forgot the name, but is starts with "T".
Sardar : Oye Kamaal ki gaadi hai, Tea se start hoti hai. Hamaara gaadi
petrol se start hoti hai.


Sardar was busy removing a wheel from his auto. A man asks sardar why
are you removing a wheel from your auto.
sardar : Cant you read the board. Parking is only for 2 wheeler.


Sardar got into a bus on 1st April when conductor asked for ticket. He
gave
Rs.10/- and took the ticket and said April fool. I have pass.


Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the
computer.
Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening.
Sardar : Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright.


On a romantic day sardar's girlfriend asks him. Darling on our
engagement day will you give me a ring.
Sardar : Ya sure, from landline or mobile.


Doctor to patient : You will die within 2 hours. Do you want to see any
one before you die?
Patient : Yes. A good doctor.


How will you destroy a submarine full of sardars ?
Simple. Just knock the door and they will open it....


Santa apni girl friend ko I Luv U kehta hai aur gir jata hai.
Gal: Yeh kya kar rahe ho?
Santa: I'm falling in love.

Museum Administrator: That's a 500-year-old statue u've broken.
Banta: Thanks God! I thought it was a new one.


A man to Santa: Aao ji chess khelein
Santa: Tu chal mein sports shoes pehen kar aaya.


At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I have lost my hand, oh!
Santa: Control yourself. Don't cry. See that man. He has lost his head. Is he crying?


Santa was getting bitten by mosquitoes the whole night. He got
irritated...
drank poison & said,
Ab kaato saalon, sab maroge!

Banta: U cheated me.
Shopkeeper: No, I sold a good radio to u.
Banta: Radio label shows Made in Japan but radio says This is all
India Radio!


NOW THE LAST TWO ULTIMATE :
 
In an interview,
Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?
Santa: Dhhuuuurrrrrrrrrr. .....
Inteviewer shouts: Stop it.
Santa: Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup...


Tourist: Whose skeleton is that?
Santa: Tipu's skeleton.
Tourist: Whose that smaller skeleton next to it?
Santa: That was Tipu's skeleton when he was child   
 

Old man joke

 

A 90-year-old man was having his annual checkup.
The doctor asked him how he was feeling.
"I've never been better," the old man replied. "I've got an eighteen-year-old bride who's pregnant & delivered a child. What is your opinion about that, Doc?" the old man asked.
The doctor thought for a moment,then said, "Well, let me tell you a story. I know a guy who is an hunter. He never misses a season for hunting. But,one day he's in a bit of a hurry and he accidentally grabs his umbrella instead of his gun. The doctor continued, "So he's walking in the woods near a creek,and suddenly he spots a lion in some brush in front of him. He raises up his umbrella, points it at the lion and squeezes the handle.
BAM! The lion drops dead in front of him."
"That's impossible!" said the old man in disbelief. Someone else must have shot that lion."

"Exactly"... Said the Doc.

Wipro bus mishap

 

Angry public set bus on fire

Staff Reporter

— Photo: K. Murali Kumar

Mob fury: The bus which was burnt down by an angry mob after it ran over a woman on Hosur Road in Bangalore on Tuesday.

Bangalore: Angry residents set a private bus on fire after it killed a pedestrian near Singasandra on Bangalore-Hosur Road on Tuesday night.

According to the police, the bus was ferrying employees of Wipro from Electronics City to their houses in the city. Around 7.45 p.m., the driver of the bus reportedly lost control over the vehicle and hit a woman who was crossing the road. She died on the spot.

Case registered

The onlookers soon began to gather at the spot. Fearing an attack, the driver ran away. People then asked the 30-odd Wipro employees in the bus to get down.

They later set the vehicle on fire. Two fire tenders were rushed to spot to extinguish the fire.

The Madiwala traffic police have registered a case and are making efforts to identify the victim. The police are yet to get in touch with the private bus operator to get the details about the driver.

Traffic disrupted

The traffic on one side of the busy Hosur Road was disrupted for nearly an hour. The traffic was diverted for sometime on the service road.

Passing an exam

 

Three patients in a mental institution prepare for an examination given by the head psychiatrist.

If the patients pass the exam, they will be free to leave the hospital. However, if they fail, the institution will detain them for five years.

The doctor takes the three patients to the top of a diving board looking over an empty swimming pool, and asks the first patient to jump.

The first patient jumps head first into the pool and breaks both arms.

Then the second patient jumps and breaks both legs.

The third patient looks over the side and refuses to jump.

"Congratulations! You're a free man. Just tell me why didn't you jump?" asked the doctor.

To which the third patient answered, "Well Doc, I can't swim!"

Argentina Vs Brazil (Ad campaign during the World Cup)

 

Before the football match between Argentina and Brazil, an Argentinean condom company came up with this ad (image 1) to show the Brazilians what they were going to do to them.

Brazil won the match and their Football organisation replied to the ad (image 2) (see the pics sideways)

Useful websites

http://mapmash.googlepages.com/tvmap.htm

Live TV from CNN, Russia, Canada, CNN IBN India and other channels (totally around 10 from around the world)

 

http://www.flightstats.com/
Tracking flights through Google maps. It has a very good interface.

 

http://www.flightview.com

Another good flight tracking site. It has a standalone window which keeps tracking the flight. But the tracker is not as good as the flightstats tracker. Tracks only flights inbound and outbound to north american airrport.

 

http://www.gearthblog.com/blog/archives/2007/09/google_earth_flight.html

Google Earth 4.2 now includes Flight Simulator Mode which is an easter egg. So go to this site to find out how to be an F-16 pilot

 

 

 

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Catch up on fall's hot new shows on Yahoo! TV. Watch previews, get listings, and more!

Live Bangalore Traffic

http://www.btis.in/

Gives live traffic in key points in bangalore

Also supports directions as well as SMS

 

 

http://bangalorelive.in

Live webcam placed at 5 traffic points in bangalore

 

Celebrity Urine therapy

This one goes to my new list of my new BIG ideas.

The story goes like this. I was inviting one of my friends to my house, when he asked: "what will you give me if i come to my house" .
I said "I will give you urine therapy. I have bottles of medicine stored up just for you"
he says: " i dont mind urine therapy as long as it is sharon stone's".

TRINGG... idea strikes me.
We will set up a big store where we will be storing up clebrity urine samples. Some of them will be stored in huge cans underground so that thy can be used after 10-15 years(at that time it will worth much more!!)

I am looking for retailers, dealers, and sample collectors who are interested in this.

From glamour world to penury

— Photo: PTI

Fallen star: Geetanjali Nagpal being taken to the VIMHANS Hospital in Delhi.

New Delhi: Hers is a journey from the glitter of the fashion world to utter destitution.

Found begging on the streets of the capital, ex-model Geetanjali Nagpal now has nowhere to go with her family disowning her and government agencies floundering in finding a shelter for her and taking hours to decide on how to rehabilitate her.

Ms. Nagpal (32), who once walked the ramps for top designers, was found by a photojournalist begging at a market in posh South Delhi on Friday.

The Delhi Commission for Women (DCW) swung into action and took her to the VIMHANS Hospital, where doctors diagnosed her as suffering from fear psychosis and said she had to be hospitalised.

However, the VIMHANS refused to admit her saying a case had to be registered first.

DCW chairperson Barkha Singh took Ms. Nagpal to the Hauz Khas police station. However, the police did not register a case after which the ex-model was taken to the court of the Metropolitan Magistrate.

With her matted hair, dirty clothes and unwashed look, Ms. Nagpal, however, said: “I was only asking, not begging.”

There was some drama outside the hospital as Ms. Nagpal refused to leave the car and go inside for a check-up. Doctors then came to the car and spoke to her.

Daughter of a Navy officer, Ms. Nagpal graduated from Lady Shri Ram College. She left home in 1990 and took to modelling full time. Ms. Nagpal went from Delhi to Mumbai, but her career failed to take off. — PTI

Pope's comments on islam

There was much furore yesterday on comments made on Islam by the Pope. The full text of the speech is here (http://www.vatican.va/holy_father/benedict_xvi/speeches/2006/september/documents/hf_ben-xvi_spe_20060912_university-regensburg_en.html). The following sentences are what incensed the muslim world. In his speech he quotes a Byzantine emperor as telling his persian interlocutor - "Show me just what Mohammed brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached".

 

The statement is understandable as the Pope was making a theological speech to an academical society. But what the Popal advisosrs should have remembered were two things:

a) He represents and is the supreme spiritual leader and that each and every word that he speaks will be taken as the representative of the whole Christian community and that his words would be broadcast and reviewed by a large amount of people.

b) Muslims are very sensitive to Prophet Mohammed and any words spoken against would truly hurt their feelings. Even though he is just quoting the arguments between two people, when he quotes it, it going to be seen by the world as being said by the Pope.

 

My advice to the Papal advisory is that they should be much more careful, infact extremely careful, when dealing with such sensitive issues.

 

Vettaiyadu Villaiyadu - movie review

[Other transliterations for this movie name could be "Vettaiyaadu Vilaiyadu", "Vetayadu Vilayadu", "Vettaiyaadu Vilaiyaadu". Added here so as to make search engine searches for any of these terms shows this page.]

 

I believe that the story of the movie for the director to unveil during the process of the movie, and hence knowing the story, or part thereof,  beforehand would strip you of the whole movie experience. Hence you wont find any details of the story, let alone any spoilers.

 

I see Tamil movies only when it is made by a good director. This time it was Gautham Menon, whose Kakka Kakka had impressed me. As mentioned at the start of the movie, this movie is about "an episode in a police officer's life". However, this episode spans a couple of years, I guess.

 

Though at times the frequent cuts and zooms does distract you a bit, Gautham has been very successful in telling a story, where one can identify with the characters involved. Since you feel so much attachment to the characters, every scene and every dalogue builds up the tension during the latter part of the movie. This is one of the very few action movies where I really bited my nails - not much because of the action itself, but because of the good story telling. In fact, in my opinion, for a movie the story telling is primary. Everything else is secondary.  

 

This movie is not for the feeble hearted. It contains lot of graphic violence and gory sequences. I guess this movie would have been rated with an "A" certificate. Even though there are a couple of holes in the plot, everything else outweighs that. 

 

I was just meserised by the performance of Kamal Hassan. His emoting is so subtle that you never feel that it is Kamal Hassan, and you would never feel that he is "acting". To me, that is the quality of any good actor. On the other extreme is Prakash Raj, who only has a small role in the movie. In my opinion, he is one of the most overrated actors. His emoting goes to the extremes of overacting that by watching him on the screen, you know that he is acting, or trying to act. Everyone else is some where in between these two extremes.

 

Some of the songs are likeable. I particularly like the frequenlty recurring background jingle, although it remind of one of A R Rahman's songs.

 

Overall, this movie is a must for the action movie buffs and serious moviegoers as well, but the feeble-hearted please stay away. 

We were in Korea for a business trip last week. We went to a Korean restaurant for dinner. The problem with such restaurants is that it is difficult to convey what you want. And you would be in a total fix if you happen to be a vegetarian. Since I am a non-vegetarian, who is OK with eating wide variety of meat, we ordered some meat dish. The waiter bought some raw meat onto a grill which was kept on top of the dinner table.

The thing is, it didnt look like chicken, nor did it look like beef. It felt a bit scary, because we all know that dog meat is supposed to be a delicacy in some parts of Korea. (It seems it all started when there was scarcity of meat, the residents of a particular province started to cook and eat the next available thing around - the dog).

Now, coming back to ourstory, we had only a few couple of choices with us:
(1) Eat it assuming that it is chicken.
(2) Even if it is dog, it is all a combination of atoms and molecules, and it doesnt mean a heck to the body whether it is dog meat or human meat.
(3)

We decided to choose (b). After a couple of minutes, the meat starte to cook, and the waitres came and cut it into pieces. Finally, it looked like this:

Proof that there is no God

If there is someone out there as God, I challenge him if he can delete this blog entry off this page. If you still see this post, then you know the conclusion....

Upcoming trip

Well due to official reasons, I am not supposed to reveal who I am or what my name is. Anyway, what really matters is not who I am, but what I do.

In a couple of weeks I am supposed to make an official trip to South Korea. They want me to deploy some nuclear warheads and vapourise those North Korean bastards. Well I am thinking of bringing back some bombshells too(blonde ones that is).

From a friend who had been recently to Korea, I heard that Korean women play a dominating role in the family. They control the financial matters. There are cases of domestic violence too - of wifes battering their poor husbands. Whatever happened to the male lib !! There was this Korean friend of his who was given a daily allowance of 1000 wons for buying cigerattes(One pack of cigarette costs 2500 wons). There was this other guy who had one peg too much of booze and went home in a less than balanced condition. His wife refused to let him in and he had to spend three nights and five days with this friend of mine.

For all of you who are wondering why this is so, this is probably due to the fact that a lot of male population perished in the frequent wars with the N Koreans(N for north or nuclear as you may wish to interpret), leaving less than a male for every female. The result is that even if a female breaks from a relationship, she will find another mate, but the same is not true for the males. So they have to keep their mates happy.

Ever since I heard about this grim situation there, I decided to hold off my plans to find a bombshell from Korea. The last thing I can have is a money sucking machine at my home.